I learn something new every day.  Some days I learn about myself other days I learn about the world, but I always learn.  It’s a philosophy I adhere to.  Today is no different.

Today marks my wife and I’s 10 year anniversary and we decided to celebrate in an unconventional way.  Not by sharing gifts, we didn’t purchase a single thing for each other, but by sharing memories.  After all what can you buy for a woman who has everything she needs and almost everything she wants.

We made a pair of reservations for a couple’s hot stone massage at a therapeutic day spa and for dinner at our favorite tapas restaurant.  I didn’t go into this attempting to learn anything, yet I did.

During the check in process for our massage we were informed there would be a male masseur and a female masseuse.  We will be in the same room with each other the whole time, but did I feel more comfortable having my wife massaged by a man or by myself receiving his services.  At the moment I thought nothing of it and replied “I’ll take who ever does a deeper muscle massage, she’ll take the lighter one”  It was only when I put my face in the hole of the table did I start to learn.

It ate at me for the first few minutes.  I kept asking myself why would I care?  Then I realized what I learned.  Men are so unsure about their own masculinity the massage parlor felt the need to ask.  It all came rushing to me at once.  Men who inflate their chests and strut around like a peacock when confronted are not “tough guys” they’re insecure.

Think about it.  When professional athletes injure themselves they have a massage.  Most professional athlete masseur are male.  Do you think Drew Brees minds?  How about Kevin Durant?  I don’t know these two men, but for some reason I doubt it.

Men now a day are so unsure of themselves they will freak if you touch their hand by mistake when handing back change at the store.  God forbid you put your arm around another guy if it’s not followed by some sort of college fight song or when you’re shouting SALUTE!!! at the bar.  It’s odd for me.  We look at each other as direct competition in every form.

Men, this is a calling.  Be sure of yourself.  If you’re the muscle-bound testosterone junky or if you’re the computer wiz who has no clue what he can bench press because quite frankly you have more important things to do than move heavy things from one place to another be sure who you are and own it.  Stop trying to impress yourself and start being yourself.

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