People: Different yet Equal

People:  Different yet Equal

All men are created equal.

Let that sink in.


We as American’s say these words, yet few of us believe them.

When we stop thinking about each other as a certain ethnicity and realize just how similar we really are we will learn how precious life is.  We can see all the colors of the rainbow and see them all as beautiful, yet we look at each other as different because of what we look like.

I recently discovered a website where you can blend photo’s of multiple people and see what they would look like.  The good people at The Chive compiled a group of “average” persons from different parts of the world by using this website.

As you look through all the photo’s notice how similar they are.   Look into their eyes.  You will see someone you know in each one.

Life is beautiful.  People are unique.

Lets fight against preconceived notions about a person and allow them to open up to you.  Learn to love people.  When you meet someone new forget what you know about “that type of person” and accept them as the person they are.  Meet everyone on the level.

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Be Unapologetic

Be Unapologetic

Have you ever watched someone with amazing talent do what they do best?  It doesn’t matter if they are cooking food, painting, playing the piano, or using tools to build a wood trinket.  I’m always amazed at people who have found what they are good at and watching them be genuinely happy while they’re doing it.  The passion and intensity in their eyes and the calm that comes over them while they’re at their craft is aw inspiring.  These people have found what makes them happy.  Their God given talent.

Everyone has something that makes them happy.  Give the most abrasive person in your neighborhood a reason to share their passion without consequence with you and watch them lighten up.  You never know, the bearded biker man down the road you’re afraid to make eye contact with just might have a passion for helping kids learn to read.  The old lady who yells at people for walking on her grass just might enjoy knitting blankets for cancer patients.  I use these two examples because I know Mr. Biker and Mrs. Getoffmygrass.  While helping others they smile.  You can see into their soul, and it’s beautiful.

Find the one thing that makes you happier than anything else, and do it.  Do it often.  Do it proudly.  If dancing like a complete fool barefoot in your front yard makes you happy, then do it.  Who cares what the neighbors think.  If its baking cupcakes, make a ton of them and share with the world (wouldn’t hurt to send me some by the way).  If its blogging, get to it.  Write your heart out.  Stop caring what others think, do what makes you happy and don’t stop.

With all the anger and resentment in society today you need to be the light.  Be the torch for the world to see.  Be happy, be you, be unapologetic.

Making Her Smile

Making Her Smile

I have 2 dogs.  Correction, I have 2 dogs, 2 cats, and The Chicken.  This isn’t any ordinary chicken, it’s The Chicken.  My wife, Harmony, and I had different ideas of how to live our lives while we were in the younger years of the relationship.  I wanted to live in a big city, drive an exotic sports car, and only wear suits that cost more than most people make a month.  She on the other hand wanted a chicken.

More specifically she wanted a farm.  Goats, horses, chickens, and the whole works.  There was a reckoning about 2 years after we started dating.  I came over to her mom’s house where her brothers lived and had goats they showed in the 4H fair.  I could see her blonde hair from down the road inside the goat pin, I assumed she was feeding them.  I was wrong.  She was in the middle of a very intense game of King of The Hill.  For some reason at that moment I realized I loved her.  It took watching her play with farm animals to understand that.  No.  It took seeing her be truly happy to understand that.

So that was it I knew what I had to do.  Make her happy the rest of her life.  Oh trust me it wasn’t for her, it’s a very selfish thing.  Seeing her smile so hard her eyes squint.  That’s what makes me happy.  Now that’s it.  We need some goats.

Fast forward 11 years and we purchase the home we’re in now.  It’s a real fixer upper.  That’s putting it nice.  A 3,800 sq-ft 3 story monstrosity that was affixed to the face of this world in 1906.  Have you ever meet a dog owner who’s furry friend is so ugly all you can say is, awww. how cute?  Well this house is very cute we’ll say.  It doesn’t come with much of a yard to house any real farm animals, but she also likes cats.  So cats it is.

That’s the beginning.  I had 1 rule.  Never have more pets than adults who live in the house to take care of them.  So we had a cat.  The rule didn’t work in my favor.  2 adults 1 cat.  We took a trip to pet refuge.  She picks out the saddest, most pitiful looking dog in the world.  Elliot, aka moose, is a half basset hound half black lab handful.  His belly hangs only 4 inches from the floor due to his incredibly short legs and his ears aren’t much higher up.  He’s a goofy looking thing and at 80 lbs the largest lap dog I’ve ever seen.  So now we’re at 2 for 2, but we’re not done.

After the cat passed away my wife longed for another feline companion.  I looked and looked for a fluffy gray cat.  Something sweet that would just lounge around.  I looked for a while for the perfect pet.  Then the phone call.  Honey?  When are you coming home?  I got something for you for your birthday.  My birthday was just around the corner and I knew she was up to something.  I get home to find a bulldog named Titus with a big blue bow on his head.  I’ve always wanted a bulldog.  He was cute, but now we’er in a predicament.  She still wants a cat and we’re at our magic 2 for 2 count, but she’s not happy.  I knew what I had to do.

I found a young lady who had a black kitten.  She found her on the side of the road in a box, but couldn’t keep her.  Allergic.  The only catch.  She also found the kittens brother.  Take it or leave it.  I took it.  When I brought the kittens home for her just a few days shy of Christmas I saw that smile again, this time on both her and our daughters face.  Dad/Husband of the year award was won on that night.

So now we find ourselves at a 4 for 2, I’ve doubled my problem.  Then The Chicken.

My wife’s uncle moved in down the road from us.  He bought a small farm with cows and chickens and we help him take care of them and the garden.  It allows us to have farm fresh produce without having a big yard.  It works for both households, gives my wife the farm living feeling, and saves our grocery bill.  Win Win.  Once the weather turned cold her uncle was butchering the chickens and wasn’t sure if he wanted to have chickens anymore.  On one fateful night, a cold windy night, I believe it was a full moon.  Ok ok ok that’s not all truthful, I have no real memory of the night, but it was night.  While helping her uncle Harmony heard a noise.  It sounded like a baby chicken.  She opened the pen and there it was.  A little fuzzy chick.  No other chickens around.  They were all sent off to butcher earlier that day.  I guess there was 1 egg missed.  The 1 egg that housed the only chicken born on this farm.  It was  meant to be.  I would swear the chickens first peep was “peep…take me home…peep”.  She listened.  The Chicken, her name is nugget, makes Harmony happy.

The rule of 1 animal per adult human wasn’t as firm of a rule as I thought.  The Chicken was for selfish reasons.  I don’t like chickens, unless they’re smothered in BBQ sauce.  What I do like is to see Harmony smile.  Smile so big her eyes squint.

Man’s Biggest Fear, Other Men

Man’s Biggest Fear, Other Men

I learn something new every day.  Some days I learn about myself other days I learn about the world, but I always learn.  It’s a philosophy I adhere to.  Today is no different.

Today marks my wife and I’s 10 year anniversary and we decided to celebrate in an unconventional way.  Not by sharing gifts, we didn’t purchase a single thing for each other, but by sharing memories.  After all what can you buy for a woman who has everything she needs and almost everything she wants.

We made a pair of reservations for a couple’s hot stone massage at a therapeutic day spa and for dinner at our favorite tapas restaurant.  I didn’t go into this attempting to learn anything, yet I did.

During the check in process for our massage we were informed there would be a male masseur and a female masseuse.  We will be in the same room with each other the whole time, but did I feel more comfortable having my wife massaged by a man or by myself receiving his services.  At the moment I thought nothing of it and replied “I’ll take who ever does a deeper muscle massage, she’ll take the lighter one”  It was only when I put my face in the hole of the table did I start to learn.

It ate at me for the first few minutes.  I kept asking myself why would I care?  Then I realized what I learned.  Men are so unsure about their own masculinity the massage parlor felt the need to ask.  It all came rushing to me at once.  Men who inflate their chests and strut around like a peacock when confronted are not “tough guys” they’re insecure.

Think about it.  When professional athletes injure themselves they have a massage.  Most professional athlete masseur are male.  Do you think Drew Brees minds?  How about Kevin Durant?  I don’t know these two men, but for some reason I doubt it.

Men now a day are so unsure of themselves they will freak if you touch their hand by mistake when handing back change at the store.  God forbid you put your arm around another guy if it’s not followed by some sort of college fight song or when you’re shouting SALUTE!!! at the bar.  It’s odd for me.  We look at each other as direct competition in every form.

Men, this is a calling.  Be sure of yourself.  If you’re the muscle-bound testosterone junky or if you’re the computer wiz who has no clue what he can bench press because quite frankly you have more important things to do than move heavy things from one place to another be sure who you are and own it.  Stop trying to impress yourself and start being yourself.